Life Goes On

Sometimes I think we don’t truly realize the impact our dogs have on our lives until they’re no longer physically here with us. Not that we take them for granted per sé while they are here. We certainly don’t mean to at least.

For instance, once Callie was house trained, she was allowed to sleep wherever she wanted to. She would start out on the bed, next to my feet, and end up in the bathroom on the linoleum floor. But if she had to go to the bathroom while I was asleep, she would come back in the bedroom and lick my nose until I woke up and then just look into my eyes until I got up and took her outside. Unless she was sick – then she was a bit more “urgent” about it – but she still did her best to wait.

Now that she’s gone, I find myself on the verge of tears every morning because she’s not sitting there with her chin on the edge of the bed willing me to wake up. But life goes on. 

 

From the time Shadow joined our little family, Callie took it upon herself to be doggie mama, protector, playmate, and best friend. They were inseparable. And I knew they would always keep each other company when we were away from home. They were almost always snuggled up close to each other – or standing side-by-side at the front door – waiting for us to come home.

Now poor Shadow always has a sad, lonely look in her eyes when we have to leave without her. And my heart breaks all over again. Ducky is still too possessive of toys – and too easily bored without them – to trust her outside of her crate while we’re gone. So, we try to keep Shadow’s alone time to a minimum. At least when we’re playing with her – or loving on her – she is happily wagging that beautiful floofy tail and smiling.

 
 At the vet, Callie and Shadow were almost always each other’s “moral support”.  Callie was always happy to see people, no matter who they were. It never seemed to phase her to be poked and prodded. She loved Dr. Steve and he loved her. Shadow seemed to come out of her shell at the vet’s office when Callie was there with her.  Now she hides in the corner most of the time. But Doc loves her, too; and she will eventually go to him for a kiss and a treat. Maybe some day she’ll forget about her anxieties and not play hard to get?  Until then, life goes on.

Last but not least. Ducky used to pester the bejeepers out of Callie to get her to play. She would try to “hump” Callie on every part of her body, especially her upper legs.  It was hysterical at times. And Callie would just tolerate it most of the time. Or, she’d get up and move to a different spot. Or, she’d give in and play for a few minutes.

The other night I caught Ducky trying to hump Shadow. Shadow just ignored her and laid down on one of the dog beds. Life goes on.

My sweet Callie is on Guardian Angel duty for a while. I asked her to watch over a friend’s dog while she was in surgery. And to keep watching over her for as long as necessary.  She still watches over us, too. I miss her every waking moment; but I find comfort in knowing her spirit is always with me.

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16 thoughts on “Life Goes On

  1. Jan K says:

    Life does go on…but it’s just not quite the same, is it? I guess it is all part of it, it’s just not a part we like very much.
    Sheba is feeling pretty good since I got home today….it seems Callie is doing her job well. 🙂

    • My Golden Life says:

      I’m glad Sheba is feeling well! She has been on my mind and in my prayers all day. I’m glad Callie is there, watching over your girl. I’m sure you feel better, too, just being home with her. Get a good night’s sleep and we’ll talk soon.

  2. Groovy Goldendoodles says:

    I’m tearing up as I type. I too have memories of Leo that I cannot seem to shake. It’s so unbearable at times that I think I’m going to be physically ill. I would have never ever imagined that something could be so painful for so long. I can so relate to this post. So sorry for your loss, thanks so much for sharing. #wearenotalone

    • My Golden Life says:

      I didn’t mean to make you cry! I’m sorry! I don’t really want to “shake” any of the memories I wrote about…in time my heart will heal enough to let me smile at the thought of them more often than cry. Writing about the memories is my way of preserving them for those days in the future when my age erases them from my own memory chip.

      And I am sorry for your loss as well.
      #wearenotalone – so true!

  3. easyweimaraner says:

    it’s not easy to describe, but I think if we lose a dog the whole world stops for a moment… and when the world and life go one, then nothing is like before… we sure have to carry on, but sometimes it is darned hard when we feel that a part of our life and a part of us is missing…

    • My Golden Life says:

      Easy, I do believe that is the best description of it that I’ve ever seen or heard! You have put into words what I have been feeling since Callie went to Heaven. I just couldn’t find the words for those feelings. And I know that in her own way, Shadow feels the loss even more deeply than I do. So, we help each other muddle through it one day at a time, moment to moment. And sometimes the little demon brat (Ducky) does something to make me laugh and make Shadow wag her tail. ❤️

      • easyweimaraner says:

        It’s not easy for us nor for the dog who will miss the partner… I’ve noticed that our dogs became like an “elderly couple” during the years, they knew each other and they accepted the quirks of each other.As we lost the first one it was super hard for the dog who was still with us…. and it wasn’t easy for me to cheer her up and to pretend to be a happy camper while my heart was as heavy as a rock :o( hugs to you and a lot of power to make every day to a good one for you, Callie and the Ducky-demon :o)

      • Jan K says:

        I also think Easy described it perfectly. This conversation makes me think of when we lost our Lab mix Maggie. At the time we also had our beagle Kobi. Maggie died in a tragic accident at only 5 years old and Kobi was devastated (along with us). We got another beagle (Cricket) as soon as we could and Kobi always got along with her and the other dogs we’ve gotten since. But, honestly? He never had the same relationship with them as he had with Maggie, and he was just never the same. He had a good life and I’d say he was happy, but he was always such a serious guy after that. That’s the best word I can think of to describe it. He and Maggie were best buddies and no one could ever take her place with him.

      • My Golden Life says:

        Thanks for sharing these thoughts, Jan. I certainly don’t expect any other dog – even another Golden – to take Callie’s place for Shadow; but I am hopeful that she and Ducky will eventually become friends rather than just competitors for our time and attention, or sisters vastly different in age and personality.

  4. cocoabean2225 says:

    I still cry for my Daisy. They really do leave such an empty space but I know she is with me and she made me a better person and I want to make her proud as she watches me. I feel Daisy sent Cocoa to us. Cocoa is so different from Daisy. They leave footprints on our hearts for sure!!

  5. Tails Around the Ranch says:

    It took Sam a long time to get over the loss of his beloved sheepdog friend. He absolutely adored Puck. I think he especially enjoyed her attention even when she played extra rough and she was a bruiser at times. Years later he still does a double take whenever he sees any OES’s. I know that sweet rascal still lives in our hearts and watches over us. You’ll always think of sweet Callie but I promise it does getting better with time and those tears of love flow a little less, replaced by heartfelt smiles of love and happy memories. ❤

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