What Would Mom Want Me To Do?

Before I go too far into my thoughts here, let me thank all of you for your positive “vibes”, prayers, and support as hubby and I await the pathology report and probable diagnosis of  Callie’s enlarged lymph nodes.   We appreciate it so much more than we could ever put into words.

Now, on to the title of this post.  

I have often wondered if my Mom sent Callie to us so that she could make her own presence known to me through my dog.  Mom always said she was going to come back as a pampered poodle.  Well, she didn’t get the breed right, but all my dogs have always been pampered with love if not material riches.  My mom was her parents’ first-born child.  She was strong-willed, independent, loving, patient, and protective of those she loved.  

Callie was the first born puppy of her litter.  She is strong-willed, independent, loving, patient, and protective of those she loves.  Now do you see the connection?  

When Mom first found the lump on her breast in 1976, she was scared but she was also determined to do whatever she had to do to go on living the life she loved.  After a needle biopsy at our family doctor’s office pointed toward probable malignancy, she had the doctor schedule her for an oncological consultation immediately.  Two weeks later, she had the mastectomy and so began her three-and-a-half-year battle for her life.  She kept her attitude upbeat and positive, even throughout the chemotherapy treatments that left her nauseated and only she knew what else.

So, if Mom truly does “possess” Callie at times, what would she want me to do for Callie?   It’s clear to me, so I’ll spell it out for everyone else. 

First and foremost, Mom would want me to remain calm, upbeat, and positive. I already decided yesterday morning that regardless of the outcome of the pathology report, I am going to do everything in my power to make sure that whatever time Callie has left in this world will be HAPPY and full of UNCONDITIONAL love. My dog — and her sisters — will not leave this world doubting my love for her. 

Second, if it is lymphoma, I will allow the vet to treat Callie with chemotherapy to medically fight the cancer. But only for as long as her quality of life is maintained. 

If her quality of life begins to disintegrate, we will have to re-evaluate the situation and possibly make the decision to let her go.  Hopefully that decision is still at least a year away. 

And, last but not least, any other decisions that need to be made will be wholly and unequivocally made in CALLIE’s best interests. Not mine. Not hubby’s. Not even Shadow’s or Ducky’s. This is Callie’s life, not ours. 


24 thoughts on “What Would Mom Want Me To Do?

  1. Jan K says:

    Shortly after my mother died suddenly of a heart attack, a stray cat started hanging around our work. We ended up taking that cat home….I always felt like my mother had sent him to us. Poor Franklin had so many health issues, and he only ended up living for about a year, but he got me through a time when I needed someone to care for as a distraction from my grief.

    It was only months before that when we lost our dog Shelby to lymphoma. She did get chemotherapy, and it gave her 2-3 months of quality life that we all treasured. We never regretted the decision to treat her. I think the treatments can give much more time now than they did back then too (16 years ago). If you’d like to read Shelby’s story, here is the link to a post I wrote: http://www.wagnwoofpets.com/give-cancer-the-paw-shelbys-story/
    I think it could help, Sue, and be sure to read one comment on there from a vet…what she had to say was hopeful too.

    I think the decisions you have already made for Callie, and the resolve you have to put her first will help you all through this difficult time. Of course, still hoping the vet is wrong….but I think it’s best to prepare ourselves. I have this undying hope that if I always expect the worst, the worst will not happen. At least that’s what worriers like me say I think. :/
    Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers, of course.

    • My Golden Life says:

      Thanks, Jan! While I have some quiet time — all 3 dogs are asleep nearby and Sam is watching something on the TV in the bedroom — I will go back and read Shelby’s story. I am worried, very worried, but like Mom was, I’m also determined to help Callie through this so I HAVE TO stay calm and upbeat for her sake.

  2. Donna O. says:

    I totally believe that certain people and animals are *sent* to us from others who have loved us in the past. I wish you the best of luck in however this turns out. IF it does turn out to be a worst case scenario, I’ve heard good things about treating dogs for lymphoma. Many many dogs do very well with the treatment, and the chemo does not seem to affect them as negatively as it does people. Still hoping it’s not lymphoma, but wanted to throw that out there, just in case. Will be waiting and worrying with you.

    • My Golden Life says:

      Thanks Donna!! Another blessing in all this is that we have a wonderful vet who loves his patients. He adores our girls, even the little stinker-brat, and knows we will always do what we feel is best for each of them. I have NO qualms whatever entrusting him with Callie’s care. I know he will always tell us honestly what he would do if she were his dog. Nine times out of ten I have opted for that suggestion.

  3. Pooch Smooches says:

    Sorry you are having to go through this. It sounds like you’ve made some wise decisions. I know it’s hard not to sometimes get down, but when our pup had a 15 month battle with cancer, I kept reminding myself there was no point in getting a jump on the grieving and we tried to stay positive and make every day as pawesome as it could possibly be. I know you’ll do the same for your sweet girl. Every day is so precious! Going to go hug my puppy now… Will continue to send pawsitive thoughts your way!

  4. Groovy Goldendoodles says:

    I truly believe your story. I believe that angels are with us in various forms. Your battle plan for Callie is spot on – it’s all abutter quality and comfort going forward. God bless her and you as you travel this road together. Please keep us posted.

  5. Jodi says:

    I firmly believe our loved ones never really leave us and often times send us just what we need. I think you are making very wise decisions.

    I’m like Jan, if I always think the worst, it’s not usually as bad as I expected.

    You know you are not alone in this, we are all here with you and will be no matter what. Sending lots of positive thoughts and healing energy.

  6. Emmadog says:

    Mom says the older she gets, the more she picks up on signs being sent to her to help guide her in life. You know Callie best, and if you feel your Mom is helping you make decisions, go with it. My mom often says other former pets are steering us current pets. We have our paws crossed for the best outcome for you and Callie.

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